Getting Ready for Church

There are so many things that happen before, during and after our family goes to church that I could probably write on this subject for days, but today I'm choosing to share my experiences getting three little girls ready for church, not to mention myself, and my husband. Every Sunday morning I set my alarm for 5:30 am in hopes that I will be able to get up at that time thus not having to rush my family out the door. Failure number one is that I almost never get up. I convince myself that I can sleep just a few more minutes, I mean after all it is Sunday and I am exhausted, and then when I finally wake up it's to the baby yelling, "Mom" into the monitor and it almost always 7:00. So I fly out of bed because church starts at 8:30 and I have 5 people to get out the door. I run up the stairs get the baby out of bed, wake my older two up and yell down the stairs for my husband to get up. I then begin begging the children to either eat or get dressed and they never want to do either. So I systematically line them up and dress them one at a time. Then I fix each one's hair. This all takes at least 30 minutes becuase they are fighting me all the way. People are crying and screaming, some are non-responsive, but I just keep dressing them and pulling hair. Meanwhile, I'm yelling at Jake to get in the shower becuase for some reason it takes him far longer to get ready than it takes me. This man doesn't even have hair! I don't know what he does in that bathroom but it takes forever. My suspicion of course is that he is just avoiding the mass chaos going on in the living room, but I know he would deny this. So while he is in the shower I'm yelling the kids are screaming and many un-christian things are being said both ways. This is usually the one time per week that I channel my mother. I can't be certain but I'm pretty sure her words come right out of my mouth. You know the usual, "Someday you are going to have kids and I hope they behave like this for you," or the ever popular, "You will be sorry." And so the morning goes. I fight with everyone of them about what they will eat and pretty much force feed them. There is always some sort of wardrobe tragedy such as gogurt spilled all over or even better smeared in the hair. And just when I finally have everyone almost ready I realize I still have my nightgown on, and better yet, it is now 8:00 am. So for the 7th time this week I skip showering, spray down my hair, put on a little extra perfume, throw some clothes on and we are out the door. All the way to church I'm yelling at the girls fighting in the back of the car and at the same time trying to remember all the things I know I forgot for Sunday School. At 8:25 we arrive at church and all is finally quiet, the battle is done. Or is it? Nope, it's only just begun................................